This is a continuation of a new series every Friday where I will be highlighting the growth and healing of one of my readers, a new reader each week. I sent out the call for stories that answered either ‘what is one lesson God has taught you?’ or ‘what is one way God has healed you?’ through their hard marriages, their separations, their divorces, their single mothering seasons, their forays into dating post-divorce, or even their remarriages.  These, my sweet ones, are their brave and vulnerable stories. Take heart…you are not alone.

God speaks to me through music.  Through this tumultuous journey that my family has gone on (during 8 years of marriage where escalating emotional/verbal abuse, physical and sexual abuse occurred) and for the last 19 months of healing; each part has been themed with specific songs.

God has used these songs as pillars in my healing process.  I have listed all of those that stand out to me in my journal so that I won’t forget (and so that I have them should I need their support).  I know that God has a song for me in different ways.  It always pulls at me, somewhere deep in my soul and I become obsessed with hearing the lyrics/verse.  I will hear the song or verse spoken by someone or see it written somewhere, often many times on the same day.  The songs may get stuck in my thoughts, but they always bring comfort.  This process has taught me so much about being able to hear God and believe that He is working through all ways to protect me, guide me, and heal me.

Recently, I had become obsessed with the song Oh My Soul (by Casting Crowns) and listened to it repeatedly and felt the healing wash over me.  Then one morning as I heard this song, one of the lyrics stuck in my head:

“Cause this is the valley
And even now, He is breathing on your dry bones
And there will be dancing
There will be beauty where beauty was ash and stone
This much I know”

Immediately following this, the words of another song (I didn’t realize I even knew) came to mind – Come Alive (Dry Bones) by Lauren Daigle:

“As we call out to dry bones come alive, come alive
We call out to dead hearts come alive, come alive
Up out of the ashes let us see an army rise
We call out to dry bones, come alive”

I looked up Ezekiel 37:1-14 in the bible where it speaks of the valley of the dry bones:
(vs 5 & 6) “Make breath come into you and you will come to life.  I will join you together and make the flesh grow back on you, cover you with skin and put breath in you to make you come to life.  Then you will know that I am the Lord.”  (vs 10) “…the breath came into them and they came to life and stood on their feet…”

It struck me that this passage applied to me and my young sons in three phases.

Phase 1: God pulled us out of the “grave” (valley of the dry bones).  I was an empty shell of a person and had given up hope. God pulled us out of the mess we were stuck in (through some close friends who realized what was happening) and saved us.

Phase 2: God breathed life into us and healed us on the inside (ongoing, even now) and brought us back to life.  Looking back at the last 19 months, I can actually see us slowly rising from the ashes and walking forward.

Phase 3:  My hope was gone and I felt almost destroyed. But God saw us there… (vs 11) “He will bring us out of that valley.  His Spirit will be in us and He will place us in our own land.”   We are in a safe place and God is filling our lives with peace. He has given us hope.

And He will make beauty from these ashes.  (Isaiah 61:3)


If this sweet woman’s post resonated with your heart, please know that you are not alone. Here are a few resources for you:

If you would like to join one my private Facebook groups (difficult marriage, separated/divorced, single moms, remarried), please send me a friend request at

If in a difficult marriage:
Surviving in a Difficult Christian Marriage is available as a PDF/e-book:

If separated/divorced:
Unraveling: Hanging onto Faith through the End of a Christian Marriage is available in paperback/e-book:

If a single mom:
Moving on as a Christian Single Mom is available as a PDF/e-book:

Life isn't always how we want it. When change seems elusive, and we're stuck in old routines, a gentle push or some self-reflection can make a difference. Let these questions be that nudge to get you moving.

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