I am unable to write this from personal experience as we’ve recently discussed that I’m a princess; however, I have a network of single women in my life so I asked what they have done to become financially self-sustaining post-divorce.
Here’s what these women who have made it to the other side have to say:
Be confident that you can get on your feet.
Really trust God to provide financial opportunities.
I believe God honors us if we take the steps forward to work to provide for our children even when we think it’s not how it was ‘supposed’ to be.
It took a friend telling me that I could do it.
God must be relied on.
If I need help, I have to learn to ask for it.
There is a need to figure out what is truly important in life.
The realization that you may be independent for a long, long time. That concept has to be grasped.
Women can do anything a man could do.
Educate yourself about budgeting and spending money.
You can’t do it all. (And that’s okay.)
Living within your means and saving for the future are key.
Give yourself grace.
Give God the glory for all you are, all you have.
Memorize Scripture about God’s faithfulness.
There are plenty of creative things you can do to bring in extra money. Brainstorm a list.
Always seek God’s will for your life…He knows the situation so lay it in his hands.
Look outside of the normal, expected modes of income.
Begin tithing (even if it seems counter-intuitive).
Be open to whatever God brings your way.
You women who have been left or who have left for your safety or sanity and are trying to figure out how to take care of yourselves and your children…..you rock. If idolatry weren’t a sin, I’d bow before you. I’m in awe. You’re in the trenches in ways I don’t yet understand, and I am proud of you. God sees you. Keep walking.
And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. –Philippians 4:9-
Christian Work-at-Home Moms website: http://cwahm.com/wordpress/
The Life of a Single Mom website: http://thelifeofasinglemom.com/
Trades of Hope business opportunity: www.mytradesofhope.com/erikasolgos
IDLife business opportunity: http://rod.idlife.com/
Women, Take Charge of Your Money: A Biblical Path to Financial Security, Carolyn Castleberry
My Single Mom Life: Stories and Practical Lessons for Your Journey, Angela Thomas
If this post encouraged you, you would benefit from “Unraveling: Hanging onto Faith through the End of a Christian Marriage”, found here or “Living through Divorce as a Christian Woman”, found here.
I was married for 16 years, (have two teen sons, age 14 and 16 now), and was primary breadwinner during my marriage, as my husband did not work much of the time, despite his tremendous credentials and ability to earn a very good income.
It was tough, but in some ways, it prepared me for my 5 years as a divorced mother. I cut out everything we did not need – and there were times it was tough, but praise God, my ability to earn an income (God-given and God-sustaining) helped us keep our family home, pay off my then-husband in terms of dividing up the resouces during divorce, and thrive during that 5 years. We were very careful with how we spent any money, most years we did not take a vacation, unless it could be done for almost-free. We would eat out twice per month, and very modestly. My sons were very understanding and wonderful, once they understood that we needed to be careful financially.
The most important thing is to pray, pray and pray – ask God to meet each of your needs – and watch His faithfulness. God truly helped us stretch the money I make, even when I was downsized 5 years ago, and am still earning what I was paid 15 years ago.
And it’s so important to tithe – God will pour out His blessing upon you. You cannot outgive God!
Thank you for sharing, Brenda! -Elisabeth
Beth, thank you so, so much. This article lifted me up so much and gave me more faith in God as the Provider, hope for the future and more confidence in my ability to support myself and children. Even though I am still with husband and he has a good income, he keeps most of it for himself, so I know already where my future is heading. And this is the first time I don’t regret it, but face it with courage. Many blessings!!!
Vera, I am so glad this post encouraged you! Thank you for reading and commenting! -Elisabeth