I’ve been recently reminded that I say a lot of things I shouldn’t say. Someone called me on it. And I ran into somebody who called me on it a while ago. So I am paranoid these days, to say the least. Like, if I could, I’d stop talking to everybody for like, I don’t know, a few months. I’m just feeling as if all my words do are hurt people.
And right now, I’m even more fearful about this because I have a few radio interviews coming up regarding Unraveling, and I am absolutely terrified and certain that I’m just going to say a bunch of inappropriate, wrong, unbiblical, sarcastic things.
But God is good. And when you bring something to him that is concerning you, he cares and he listens and he helps.
And here are four ways God helped me with this specific issue all within about a day.
My mentor told me that she has seen me show great compassion to women who are hurting that comes from deep inside of me, and that that is the real me.
I felt God say to me, as I was beating myself up for things I had said earlier that day, “Did it ever occur to you that I created you that way?” (Not all mean and such, of course, but to speak my mind…)
And then I had this thought. That though, as an outspoken writer on a few controversial issues, I do get my fair share of nasty comments, I get many more kind comments and emails and people thanking me for speaking up. So this little phrase floated across my mind…I help more than I hurt with my words.
And finally, moments after journaling about all this and my fear that I would embarrass myself and my kids and my friends and God on national radio, I opened up my Bible and flipped to the place in Matthew 10 where I had left off the day before. And here is where God led me:
…do not worry about how or what you should speak. For it will be given to you in that hour what you should speak; for it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father who speaks in you…
Pretty amazing, right? Isn’t that just like God? He didn’t have to go and do that. He could’ve had me read about leprosy or something, but no, he had the Spirit orchestrate his Word to match my current fear with utter perfection.
And so, I surrendered those interviews, asking him to do just what his Word is promising. I will be prayed up. I will be authentic. I will pretend I’m speaking to just one hurting woman. I might say something I shouldn’t say. But God is bigger. And I am counting on him to speak through me.
And if you want to catch me on the radio and hear how I do!, I’ll be on here:
In the Market with Janet Parshall
This is the Day with Nancy Turner
Midday Connection with Anita Lustrea & Melinda Schmidt