I have lived with a huge, cumbersome what if for the past twenty or so years.

I had a moment in time when I could have gone down one path, but I chose another. And I have wondered since that day what might other life would have looked like. I have gone so far as wondering what my other life should have looked like.

I know I’m not alone in this mind trap. Someone recently told me that she should have stayed with her first husband. She believes her life would not have only been different but infinitely better. That was forty years ago.

Author Jan Silvious says, “What might have been does not exist, so don’t even go there.” She goes on to say that, “God lives in the reality of today.” He does not live in that plan A you thought you were supposed to have.

God doesn’t deal in what-ifs. That path in my head of the life I should’ve had (if only I hadn’t been such a fool, I keep chastising myself) doesn’t even exist. It’s not like my real life, my supposed-to life, is out there somewhere in a parallel universe mocking me.

Ladies, even if sin got us to where we are, God is bigger. The place we are right now – even the place of pain we may be in – is God’s plan A, his only plan, for you and for me for right this moment.

There are no what-ifs.  There are no other paths.  We absolutely must let go of what we feel we’ve left behind, of what we fear we’ve missed.  We are living our appointed lives.  I don’t always understand it, but I believe it.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”  (Isaiah 55:9)

If this post encouraged you, you would benefit from “Unraveling: Hanging onto Faith through the End of a Christian Marriage”, found here or “Living through Divorce as a Christian Woman”, found here.

Life isn't always how we want it. When change seems elusive, and we're stuck in old routines, a gentle push or some self-reflection can make a difference. Let these questions be that nudge to get you moving.

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