So, it turns out I need other people. Like, big time.
Just in the past week or so alone, someone has surprised me with gift cards to encourage me on a bone-weary day.
Two people took both of my kids, twice, for several hours, loving them and feeding them.
Many have sent me texts and emails of encouragement and prayer and Scripture.
Some have called to leave the sweetest, most loving voicemails.
One brought me ice cream and held me while I cried.
One told me she woke up in the middle of the night to pray for me.
One dropped what she was doing and left a fun day to help me think something through.
One changed plans to talk me off the ledge.
Three made me laugh for hours and forget my problems.
One made a phone call on my behalf that I wouldn’t have been able to make on my own.
One helped me get my daughter to go to school on a day she was pretty much refusing.
One lent me something I needed.
One took my daughter out for dinner and shopping.
One drove to my house when I called.
One took my children for the evening so I could get to a new small group.
One took me in.
One called me Bethie, because he said I “looked so sad”.
One rearranged an entire night to make sure I was okay.
One drove an hour on a road she hasn’t driven on in fifteen years to sit in my office with me for two hours.
One offered to cage-fight on my behalf.
One gave me a cd of songs just this morning because she said she felt the Lord prompt her to do so.Reading this list is humbling. I don’t want to be a person who needs this much help. But you know what? In this moment in time, I am this person that needs this much help. My situation is just that chaotic and stark.
My mother said to me last night, referring to something that I said in an email about not really feeling God as much as I’d like to right now, “Just look in Erika’s eyes…just look in Sheli’s eyes…just look in Charlotte’s eyes…and try to say you don’t feel God. You can’t. Because he’s taking care of you through each one of them.” Amen and amen. I am being looked after beyond my wildest dreams. To be known this well and to feel this safe and this loved within the confines of the sweet community that Jesus has placed around me is a gift larger than words, and one that I will never take for granted.