It’s 2:45 in the morning.  I can’t fall back to sleep.  And I’m nauseous.  For whatever reason, I just realized, and I mean, really realized, that school starts in two weeks.  Big deal, right?  Well, this year is a bit different.  My husband is a teacher, so typically, about this time, I’m sighing with a bit of relief that my normalcy is going to return.  But not this year.  Because this year, my daughter is entering second grade and my son first grade.  They will both be in school full time.

Now, yes, there is a part of me that has been chanting inwardly “Fall 2004” for the past seven or so years, especially on really hard mommy days.  And yes, there is a part of me that cannot believe I’m going to have thirty hours a week to myself…to do whatever I want.  So don’t get me wrong…I’m looking forward to this new season, just with some mixed feelings and a bit of trepidation.  (I’ve already made plans with my girlfriends to come to my house for breakfast during the first week of school to help me cope.)

What is this that is making me feel like throwing up in the middle night with two weeks of summer to go still?  If you’re reading this, you’re probably a mom.  And if you’re a mom, I probably don’t need to go on.  But it’s my column and this is my therapy, so I will…   Eight years ago I was in the home stretch of my first pregnancy with my daughter, Sara.  And now, I am sitting here wondering when eight years morphed into feeling like about two or three weeks.  I remember being pregnant.  I remember sitting outside getting a bit of sun, trying to soak in those last few lazy days, knowing my life was on the verge of changing forever.  And now here I am, on the other side of the diaper years, heck the other side of the stay-at-home-mommy years basically, eight years later…but time did something more magical than just cliché-dly fly…it zoomed past me and took the youth of my children with it.  And now they are independent, wonderful children who can handle a day at school solo.  And I am left with other moms asking me if I’m excited about all the free time I’m about to have on my hands (except that I work part-time, so it’s not all that free), when I’m actually thinking, ‘no, I’m just very sad that the best and most precious season of my life…those hard, fun, sweet, amazing days and months and years of being at home raising my daughter and my son…are basically finished.’  But that’s not what I say…I just say that it’ll be interesting and then I mumble something about time flying and I sigh.

So, moms…if you’re reading this and your kids are young and at home with you all day every day…I cannot say this strongly enough…you are in one of the most wonderful stretches of life that you’ll ever be blessed to live through…and even when the day doesn’t seem like it will come to an end, it will…and one day you’ll look up from your day-to-day and realize that you’re walking your kids to school.  Saying it goes fast doesn’t even begin to describe it.  It will race ahead, with your children in tow, even if you’re not ready and willing.  So, put down that load of laundry, or unplug that vacuum, or walk away from that computer, and do whatever you need to do to enjoy your sweet children this moment.  Because time really does fly.

If this post helped you, “Moving On as a Christian Single Mom” is for you, found here.