Jesus said, “There is nothing to fear.”
Luke 5:10a (The Message)
When I was journaling this morning, I wrote down five things that are on my mind today.Little things and big things.
Two nights in a row, I’ve been up in the middle of the night for about two hours.Hate that.Concerns me a bit, because I used to do this all the time.
I’m starting to get my newest book out there just a bit. Testing the waters. I have never felt more unsure about something I’ve written then this thing. I don’t know what kinds of responses to expect. Though I’m thinking things like “blech” and “stop writing”. Maybe that’s a girl thing.
A work thing with someone in my family just came up that’s a little disconcerting.
A thought that I thought I let go of has resurfaced and it’s getting under my skin. Unnerving to say the least. Like I can’t control what comes into my head or something.
And then something that’s been brought to my attention about my children and my parenting.I needed to hear it but I don’t know what to do with it.
Then I read, after creating my list of woes, some words of Jesus. I spent Thanksgiving through Christmas leisurely reading Luke one and two to allow myself to ruminate on the Christmas story. And then I decided to keep right on reading in Luke because when was the last time I actually read one of the gospels? Yikes. So I’m in Luke 5 where Jesus has pushed himself out onto the lake in a boat to speak to the masses on the beach. And he has just told Simon to toss the net back in after a tough fishing day. And Simon doesn’t want to but he does, out of respect or to be kind or to placate. And the net is full to overflowing and he drops to his knees in worship. And Jesus says to him, “There is nothing to fear.”
But I just listed five things that are concerning me.Therefore, that are worrying me.Which really means I’ve got five things just this morning that I fear.I fear insomnia.I fear being tired every day.I fear that I cannot write to save my life.I fear no one will like this new thing.I fear this weird work situation.I fear this nagging thought.And I fear that I’m messing up my children.
But Jesus says, there is nothing to fear.Nothing.Not when He’s in the picture.And He is in my picture.
So I laid it all down.I ran it through my little grid…what can I change, what can I do not a thing about, what do I have no idea how to handle?And I laid it down again.And then I praised God and thanked Him that He was God and I am not, and I asked Him for wisdom and to entangle some of these things.
Because today Jesus told me not to fear and today I’m choosing to obey.
“Where God’s love is, there is no fear,because God’s perfect love drives out fear.” 1 John 18
There have been many times I have allowed let go things to resurface, when it happens I just choose to stop that thought… when it comes into my head & I take a deep breath and I say, I will not take back what I lay down at you feet Jesus. Thank YOU! Your Love strengthens mo. I enjoy your writing. Keep the faith sister in Christ.
You mentioned your new book and your fears and uncertainties about it. I feel like you wrote it to minister my heart. I saw the title today and bought it.
My boyfriend of two years unexpectedly broke up with me last week. We had planned to be married, and had planned almost every detail of the wedding, except the date. We were waiting on jobs to come though.
I am still in love with him, and he was a good thing. My nickname for him was God’s gift because he brought me closer to God and helped me be my best self.
My heart is broken and I hope your book will be of the things God uses to heal my heart. At the moment, my grief is great.
Good luck with your book. I intend to share it with friends.