So, I’ve made my decision about whether I will be going to Haiti in February and whether I will be bringing my son with me.
Earlier today, I mentioned I had created a list of pros and cons. Here is a portion of that list:
Cons:
- It’s somewhat dangerous to go to Haiti.
- Three potential third-world-country trips within five months is just crazy talk.
- Jack will more than likely be bored a good part of the time.
- I’m not feeling a huge leading to go, so this might be my biggest hang up of all – the fear that I’m trying to manufacture a God-thing.
Pros:
- I have been saying I want “bigger stories” for my kids. Doesn’t get much bigger than this.
- Jack wants to go, even saying he would pray about it on the bus one morning.
- Jack is okay with getting shots, only requesting that they are spread out over two days. (Totally cute, right?)
- Jack wants to go because he wants to “help the children”.
- Sara has been praying about it and said, “I don’t feel like I should go to Haiti but I think it’s something you and Jack should do.”
- My former pastor gave me advice years ago to always lead with a yes, unless a door closes.
- This is what I claim to be about now: AIDS, third world countries, caring about the poor and hurting, adventures, doing hard and scary things.
- This could be life changing for Jack.
- This could be life changing for me.
- Sounds like Kingdom work.
- Could be great encouragement to these pastors, that we’d come all the way for them.
- Scripture says “go”.
- The window of Jack wanting to go with me anywhere or on a trip like this might not be open forever.
- Fear, the chaos of three trips, and boredom are not reasons I say no to a God thing; not anymore at least.
- I do think I heard a whisper of “go” from God and to take Jack.
Regarding con #4, I felt God reply, “You can’t manufacture a God-thing. If you decide to go, I will be in it. On the other hand, since this is not an obedience issue, if you decide not to go, I will not be disappointed in you.”
So, one of the main questions is — do I not go/do something unless the door has swung wide open with flashing, neon arrows pointing to it, or do I start walking and only stop if a door shuts in my face? I said to myself, those are two entirely different personalities and ways of looking at life. Then I smiled and said outloud, Well, who do you want to be?
If this post encouraged you, I’d recommend you check out “One Girl, Third World,” found here.
So, my decision, ladies and gentlemen: Jack and I are going to Haiti!Because I want adventures in my life and adventures for my son.Because I don’t just want to talk about AIDS, I want to do something about it.Because I’m learning and relearning that perfect love casts out fear.And because I know that God will be in it, no matter what happens.That there isn’t a thing we can do to fall out of His hand.
Elizabeth,
How wonderful and exciting for you and your son, Jack to experience this incredible adventure together. Thank you for sharing!
I am constantly amazed at how God weaves the stories of his people together. How he can use someone else’s story to encourage us and challenge us in our own journey. Incredible that he is mindful of us.
2 days ago while driving my oldest son to an appointment, he inquired about a missions trip that a friend of ours participates in every year through her church. A TRIP TO HAITI! He asked when the trip was, do they let other people go, etc. It occurred to me that he was asking these questions because he wanted to go which he confirmed. He wanted to serve, he wanted to share the love of Christ. May I just confess that fear immediately gripped my heart and that my mind was screaming, “I don’t think I can do this????” Today I read your blog and the questions that you ask and I am challenged to take out my journal and lay it all out before God as I seek his guidance.
Wow!!! Speechless!
Wendy,
Thank you so much for sharing this with me. I’ll stop right now to pray for your decision. God is so cool.
Elisabeth